Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Things That Irritate Me

1. Students that are purposefully trying to irritate me. Exhibit A: We shall call him "Jerkface". He was sent to my office because he was refusing to do his classwork. This is the student who, after returning from court one day (for charges you'll be able to guess about after the rest of this story), sat in class, was asked to do work, said to the teacher, 'Fuck you, bitch!', then picked up a chair/desk combo and threw it across the room. Funny- he won't speak English, but managed to get that particular sentence out just fine! So, flash back forward to today. I decided to play the 'ignore the jerkface and see if he'll just be quiet' game. He caught on quickly to my wily ways, and started tapping his foot as loudly as it is possible to tap without actually stomping. This went on for about 20 minutes. Then, wily as he is, he realized that this was not going to get a reaction out of me, so he started ripping up his work. I quietly got up and took it from him and sat back down. Then, he started punching and banging on his desk as loudly as he could, and THIS didn't stop for about a half hour. At this point, I was ready to launch him out of the window, but I continued to ignore him. Finally, he gave up and put his head down and fell fast asleep. After a while, I faked a loud sneeze, but he didn't even move. I called the principal up and she took a photo for his file. Anyway, that is thing #1 for today that irritates me. There is only an Exhibit A for this- the other examples from today are so ridiculous, I'd rather not relive them... until returning to work tomorrow, that is...

2. Guys who think that if you speak nicely to them, that you must desire intercourse immediately or something. (In other words, the 'no wonder you're still single' guys!) Exhibit A: A nameless 25 year old young man from a country where they breed fast runners who, in the span of a week, has tried to buy me a beer, (I declined) insisted that I buy HIM a beer, (again, I declined), asked me how we were going to get to know each other better if I wouldn't talk to him, (I told him he was lucky I ever talked to him at all) and then tried to get me to drive him somewhere. (Yes, folks, I DEFINITELY declined!) I made the mistake of speaking in a friendly tone to this fellow a couple of weeks ago, and am now paying the price. I met him at the weekly 5k race that I do, and I tried to duck out of the celebratory festivities post race, and he followed me out, angry that I had left without saying goodbye. GOOD GRIEF!!! Exhibit B: A dude who evidently used to date one of my Team EnVision teammates saw me on Match.com and wrote to me. Silly me; I wrote back. Within the span of about 10 minutes, he had emailed me about eight times, stating that I was a very sexy dancer, (I am!) that I must have been VERY drunk at the party he met me at (I actually was not- I drove to that party and do NOT drink and drive), and that he likes tall women. (Well, DUH! EVERYONE likes tall women!) It is evidently dangerous to talk to human males these days. Very dangerous indeed. Guys like these are why I am single. Congratulations to all of you gals out there who snapped up a good one while they were still available!

3. Laundry. Enough said.

There. I think a list of three is a list of a nice length. I'll leave it at that for today. Now, I am going to muster up the energy to knit on that second sleeve to the Gibson Girl Pullover. Really I am.

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